Growing Up

To us, family means putting your arms around each other and being there. -- Barbara Bush

This weekend, my dad and ashley are out in Idaho visiting family and also visiting utah state--which is one of her options for college. Anyway, yesterday they had the chance to meet up with one of our neighbors that we lived by in Rexburg. They now live in the Logan, Utah area. The oldest daughter is putting out a CD this spring (her own!!) and she is really good and we recently became friends on facebook and as i was clicking through her pictures i couldn't believe how much her and her sister have grown! I remember all those times growing up and doing some crazy stuff. Then, to make things more emotional my 2nd cousin Braxton turned 11 today!! CRAZY!! Its amazing how kids grow up so fast and they really teach you what life is about. I hate growing up..it sucks! I mean, half my cousins have kids already, I'm planning on going on a mission, ashley is going to college, megan starting high school next year, kellen whos voice is changing drastically..it sounds like he has a cold and thats all i can think of. Its amazing though how a family can go through all these changes and still manages to be there for you. I think since i'm in the process of turning my papers in its all starting to hit home that i'm not going to be here during the next 18 months and life is going to go on without me and that some of my relationships with people will be different. I already know they will. I know that no matter where I go though, I'll ALWAYS have my family!!

A day late

Yesterday was probably the toughest day of the week/month/year so far. It marked the one year anniversary of my Grandpa Moss' death. During the past couple weeks, I reflected on where I was last year during that time...saying goodbye to my Grandpa. I remember like it was yesterday where I was when I got the news. It was a Sunday. I had just finished up with dinner at my Grandmas and was heading into my Great Aunts house to pick up Kellen from his b-ball game. As we were driving home, I told Kellen to call my dad (who was still in Idaho w/ my grandpa) and tell him about his game. Little did we both know, or all of us know, 15 min. later my Grandpa would pass away. Kellen and I were home for about 25 min. before my mom, ashley and megan got home from church. In walked my pap which I thought was a little strange. My mom sat us down in the living room and me being myself was of course, joking around. She told us that Grandpa had passed away an hour ago. I was shocked, upset and every word to describe my emotions was possibly true. I remember crying the whole entire night and talked to my dad that night but only less than 30 seconds because he was so upset.
With it being a year later, I've missed telling my Grandpa that I graduated from Vo-tech for Dental Assisting, Getting a job as a Dental Assistant and preparing for a mission in the summer. I know without a doubt that he has been watching over each of us throughout this past year. I miss my Grandpa everyday but I can't wait for the day when I can see him again. I miss his smile, his laugh and him cracking jokes. It took me about 9 months after his death to fully accept it. Throughout the whole grieving process however, I've gained a better testimony on families and on faith, hope and love.

Lately

Ever since November I've really started thinking about whether or not I should go on a mission. This is an experience that I want most in my life and I know I will be a better person because of it. The confirmation came to me a couple weeks ago as I sat and listened to my friend give his return home talk from his mission. I knew right then and there that I was going. This is something that I'm supposed to do and I know it. Some people might think I'm not going to make it or I can't do it...I've been told that by some people (mostly by one). Its my life and I'm going to take a stand for it..because in the end its my happiness that counts. I'm here to prove to people that I can do it and that I want to do it.

In other news, I'm going to be a bridesmaid in my best friends wedding in August! Which is going to push back my leaving date for my mission.....

Untitled

"Make a wish and place it in your heart. Anything you want, everything you want. Do you have it? Good. Now believe it can come true. You never know where the next miracle is gonna come from, the next smile, the next wish to come true. But if you believe that it's right around the corner, and you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it, to the certainty of it. You just might get the thing you're wishing for. The world is full of magic. You just have to believe in it. So make your wish. Do you have it? Good. Now believe in it. With all your heart."

I've been thinking alot about where my life will be in the coming months. I'm now preparing to go on a mission and have my papers in April. But i've lately been thinking about dreams or wishes that I want to come true. The conclusion that I've come to is that you just have to believe that they can come true and believe in them with all your heart. Life is short and full of opportunity--so take the next opportunity that might scare you or make you anxious. Life is short and afterall, you only get one shot. Think of an experience that you want to see happen in your life and make it happen.

Family...an eternal one..

Even though this is a couple weeks late, I'm still posting it. My great uncle was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer about a month ago and his health rapidly declined over the past month. He passed away tonight but through it all, I have been thankful for the knowledge of eternal families and know that I will see him again. He was a great uncle who lived life to the fullest everyday and has made an impact/inspiration on everyone that has come into his life. Now, this is me, giving my thanks for my family. The Moss family.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the Moss Family lately. I don’t know if its because every year around this time I wish I were out in Idaho or visiting family enjoying the holidays together. I haven’t had a Thanksgiving or a Christmas with the Moss family since we moved out here to PA. I was recently watching a home video that’s back from 20 years ago, when I was about 7 months old and noticing how everybody changed and even thinking “its nice to go back 20 years and not knowing where everybody has ended up, how far apart (miles) we are, who married who.” I even hate to say this but, I miss it. I miss all the memories that we had growing up and coming out to Idaho to visit. But, as I look back on my many memories, I know that my life would not be the same without them in my life. Sure, we’ve all had our differences, own challenges or trials but in the end it comes down to the two people that started the Moss Family. Our grandparents, Lyle and Bonnie Moss. We all have them to thank for raising great children who are amazing parents, aunts, and uncles. As Thanksgiving approaches, I thank Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ for blessing me with such an amazing family that I love and miss very much. I also want to thank Heavenly Father and Jesus for blessing me with such a great Grandpa who I miss everyday and know that he is with me and there is no doubt in my mind that he was proud of me and proud of all his grandchildren. He didn’t care what mistakes we made or how different we all are, he loved us all the same. On February 13, 2009, I remember sitting in Grandma and Grandpas living room surrounded by family who were dealing with the fact that we were losing a very important person in the family. I remember one moment where all 4 kids along with Grandma were around his bed and with tears Tauna said “You and mom have been a great inspiration on all us kids” Even though, he didn’t open his eyes much after a few days, he heard what we were all saying to him and he knew it even before we said it. He even knew we were all there. Over the course of the past months, I’ve had frustrations and tear filled days knowing that I wasn’t able to be out there for the services but I’ve realized now, that I’m thankful I had those last days with Grandpa. You should be too. Growing up, I’ve seen my Moms extended family grow further apart, same with my Dads. I’m scared to what the future holds for the Moss Family because they are the best family out there. They’re there when you need a ‘pick me up’, being willing to keep in touch with you over Facebook, Giving words of encouragement and I could go on for hours. Before you know it, we will all be in different places around the nation and sooner or later, all we’ll be to each other is a memory. You guys should totally see my room—its literally plastered (well, not plastered) but hung with nothing but the Moss Family. Every time I look at a picture I remember what we were doing and where it was taken and I know that you guys will always be my family and nothing can change that. So, as I bring this sappy thing to a close, I just want to say Thank you. Thank you for being great cousins and for always being there. I realized last night as my mom and I were talking about Thanksgiving that this would be the last one that I’m home for before I go on my mission. Its crazy to think that a year from now I’ll be somewhere totally different or maybe sitting in the MTC waiting to go out in the field. Thank you for opening up my eyes to what family is and what it means. As we all go on with Thanksgiving and even life, lets all thank Heavenly Father for Forever Families. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what differences we have, what we’ve done or what we’ve said, we are and forever will be family. I LOVE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU VERY MUCH (maybe some more than others—JUST KIDDING…HAHA)

Change...

I've been thinking alot lately about my job. I've had a feeling that maybe i'm not supposed to be a dental assistant. I made a list of pros and cons and the cons had it. When it all comes down to it though I'm still young (not for long though) and I have my whole life ahead of me and I need to experience life more and really find out who and what i want to be. I want to go into a profession where I can help people who are less fortunate who need someone to be there. I've always had a heart for those types of people and I want to make a difference in peoples lives--I can't do it being a dental assistant. It wouldn't make sense now to go to school if I'm going to go on a mission next spring. I don't know what to do. I've talked to 3 people outside of my family who have helped me gain an understanding of what I should do (I have talked to my family) one piece of advice that I got was to do what makes me happy and that and that its my happiness that i need to worry about. So, for now I'm going to figure out what to do with everything. I want people to be proud of me for who I am and what I'm doing. If anyone has any suggestions or anything PLEASE comment. In the end though, I know, that its my own personal decision.

famdamly

A couple weeks ago, my Grandma Moss, Aunt Peggy, Uncle Gary, Aunt Tanya and cousin Ella came out here to visit. It was such an awesome time! Grandma and Peggy flew in on Tuesday and Gary and his family Wednesday night. I didn't see much of Gary and his family since I was working a majority of the time..what can i say? i'm dedicated ;)
For the weekend, we all decided to head to D.C. since Gary, Tanya, and Ella have never been there. So, Saturday, Gary, Tanya, Ella, Megan, Peggy, Me and my mom drove to Gettysburg did an auto tour of the battlefields and drove to D.C. Dad, Ashley, Gma, and Kellen came down later since Kellen had a game. That night once everyone was there we went to a BBQ place (Red Hot and Blue) which was amazing!! Then, we went to see the monuments at night..IT WAS SO AWESOME!!
Sunday we went to D.C.--we went to the American History museum, Peterson House (where lincoln died) AND the white house!! I'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE WHITE HOUSE AND IT WAS AMAZING!!! then, we all decided to go back to the hotel and relax..then my mom and the 4 of us went home. I'd write more but my wrists hurt more now since i've become a dental assistant...